6. Let go of outcomes

This may sound counterintuitive to sex, but hear me out.

For me, a while back, at the very mention of sex I would start to feel pressured.

I felt pressured that I didn’t feel the same desire that my husband did.

I feared having another argument about sex.

And, for many women, a “happy ending” doesn’t always come easy.  At just the mere mention of sex, they might start to feel a tremendous amount of anxiety regarding their struggles to find the big “O”.

And, of course, the more pressured and stressed you feel, the less likely you will be able to enjoy sex at all.

My husband and I decided to let go of the need for there to be any particular outcome.  Sex doesn’t need to look any particular way.

The reality is, the most important part of sex ( at least for me ) is to feel connected to each other.

You have a choice. 

Choose and vocalize what you want each individual experience to be.

Sometimes you may want to work at reaching a climax, and other times you may be satisfied just pleasing your spouse.

There are no rules as to what it has to look like. 

As long as the two of you are connecting and you are both feeling satisfied, then don’t feel pressured to have it begin or end in any particular way.

And guess what? The minute that pressure of needing a particular outcome is relieved, you might be surprised how easy it is to chill out and enjoy yourself.

Relax and let go of outcomes.

Instead, focus on the connection with each other.  You might be surprised at how easily focusing on that instead, can lead to a “happy ending” anyways.

Tammy
Married and Naked

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