Yes, it’s true.
Those beautiful children that you adore more than life itself, might very well be unknowingly hurting your marriage.
I get it.
This might be a topic that is touchy. One that you might not want to acknowledge.
But, it is something that should be recognized and talked about.
My husband and I were married for 5 years before we had children.
In those years we traveled, started businesses, bought a house. But something was missing. . . I wanted children more than anything else.
So, we went for it.
At 28 we had our first child. A beautiful daughter full of love and kindness.
Of course, one wasn’t enough, so 5 years later we had our son. A sweet little man so smart and curious.
Having a child, as many of you might agree, is probably the most beautiful thing I have ever experienced. To bring a life into this world is beautiful, thrilling, scary, overwhelming and life changing.
What I didn’t understand, was the challenges that having children would pose to my marriage.
Would I change the fact that I have children? Absolutely not.
The rewards that come from parenting far outweigh the challenges.
But, having children changed everything.
Suddenly the things that once came easy to my husband and I were hard to come by, like time, connection, intimacy.
The moment we had a child our relationship was changed. In many ways for the better, but in many other ways that were potentially damaging to our relationship.
But, is it really the children that was hurting my marriage?
No.
It is us, as adults causing the damage.
Most often thru neglecting our marriage once children arrived.
No, it’s not the kids.
It’s the grown ups. It’s our shifted choices and priorities that can often cause the harm.
Click next to find out how children you might be hurting your marriage and, even better, how to fix it.
Great article! Thank you
Thank you so much. So glad you liked it.
Good reading… indeed children is critically important to us but by neglecting marriage is not a healthy practice… thank you for a great sharing
Thank you for taking the time to comment. You are right, neglecting marriage is definitely not a healthy practice. So glad you stopped by!
Have you heard of “Growing Kids God’s Way?” They talk about a lot of these things in their series – I recommend it to every parent new or experienced. There is always something new that I glean from it every time I do the study again!
No I haven’t. I will have to take a look. Thanks for the tip.
Good read. Spot on
Thank you!
I wish my husband saw it this way my step daughter was always his priority when she came around, my husband and I never slept together when she with us, and he would never allow our son to sleep with us once. It’s sad to say one of the reason my marriage is ending is because of this.
HI Karen, I’m sorry to hear that your marriage is ending. It is such an important lesson and one that is often overlooked. I am wishing you the best as you move forward in your life and start new adventures!