Over the last few weeks I have had many people reach out to me looking for guidance on how to improve their marriage.
- Many people are dealing with a lack of communication in their marriage.
- Many have lost the connection with their spouse.
- Many are not feeling in love with their spouse.
- Many are too tired to even think about intimacy.
- Many have lost the spark.
And, they don’t know what to do about it.
Believe me when I say,
I understand. I have been there too!
It is natural for marriages to have an ebb and flow to them.
Sometimes you feel really connected and the spark is alive, and other times you feel it may never come back.
If this sounds familiar, you are not alone.
Most of us have felt this at some point or another.
The truth is it’s not realistic to expect the spark to be lit 24/7.
But, the key to a healthy relationship is to not let things go too long before you work at getting the spark back. A dormant relationship, for too long, can spell trouble.
Not to worry. Over my 20 years of marriage I have learned that it is possible to get the spark back.
And, I have learned a few tricks that can help you do it.
So, because of that, I feel like there is no better time than the present to spill some of those tricks for you.
Here are 4 ways to reignite the spark in your marriage:
1. Notes Of Appreciation
We all work hard at trying to provide for our family, to be loving and supportive of our spouses and to take care of our children. Each of us deserves to be recognized for all of the energy and effort that we put in for others.
Make sure you are doing your part to tell your spouse, “Thank you!” for all that they do.
One great way to do this is to leave sticky notes around the house, in their car, their work lunch, sending texts.
Just start with, “I appreciate you because. . . “ or “Thank you for . . . “
Another great way to accomplish this is to grab The Ultimate Marriage Journal.
This is a journal created to help couples express daily appreciation to each other.
It has helped hundreds of married couples get in a habit of expressing appreciation. It can help you too. Click Here to learn more about this transformative journal.
2. Schedule one-on-one time.
Life is busy.
Sometimes, it’s hard just to find a moment to shower!
Finding time to go out to dinner or get away with your spouse is a luxury.
But, I encourage you to change your mindset a bit. Scheduling time for your spouse is vital to the overall health and happiness of your marriage. And, if your marriage is on track, everything else just seems to work better.
I encourage you to schedule date nights, overnighters away, midday rendezvous, and date time at home.
Make it a priority.
Pull the calendar out and put “date with sweetie” on it now! Even if it means date night at home.
New mindset: there are no excuses for not making time with my spouse.
Say it. Over and over!
3. Plan something sexy (yet in both your comfort zones)
If you really want to light the spark, plan something a little extra sexy.
One of our favorite things to do is play a sexy date night game on one of our overnighters away.
Click Here for one of our favorite games.
Remember to plan something that is within both of your comfort zones. Be respectful of boundaries.
There are so many fun games that you can play that can help you reconnect intimately and create a night you won’t soon forget.
4. Invest in your marriage.
One of the best ways to reignite the spark is to mutually agree to invest in your marriage.
Maybe it’s a book that you will read together.
Maybe its a marriage retreat.
Maybe it’s an online course.
Committing to focusing on your marriage together is a tremendous way to gradually bring back the connection and the spark.
If you like the idea of a DIY online course, check out The Ultimate Marriage Guide: 21 Secrets To Mastering Communication (learn more here).
This is a course designed for couples to take together to improve communication in their marriage. Watch a daily lesson of a short video and then do a fun daily action step together.
Watch your marriage grow, blossom and thrive after committing to work on and improve your marriage together.
The truth is that with intention comes change.
If you create an intention to reignite the spark, and you work on it daily, things are bound to rekindle.
Married and Naked