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Accountability in marriage.
A word that, in the past, was completely foreign to me.
There was a time, not to long ago, when my husband and I weren’t doing so good.
In fact, we were questioning whether or not we were going to make it.
Then, a friend said something to me that, quite literally,
Changed My Life!
In that moment, my marriage began to head toward a path of transformation.
Watch the video to hear what she said and to see if it can impact your marriage as well.
Remember, sometimes the first step toward change is to start from within.
Practice accountability in your life and in your marriage.
Tammy
Married and Naked
That was good. It’s great to remember in all relationships. I was specifically thinking of my daughter at the end. She’s always blaming others and never taking responsibility for her own actions. Great words. Thank you.
I’m so happy you found it useful. It is such an easy trap for any of us to fall into. Thank you for taking a minute to comment 🙂
OMG! You don’t know how much I needed to hear this Right Now! My husband and I are going through a difficult time now with our marriage, and are receiving counseling. I have tears in my eyes because I keep doing the same thing, blaming my husband for things.
This has got to be Divine Intervention! You know what you just said? We all need to be humble as Jesus was. Look at all the false accusations and insults that we’re hurled at Him. What did He do? Absolutely nothing! He stood there humbly and meekly. Thank you for telling me what I needed so much to hear. God bless you. Oh, and I don’t think it was an accident that I learned about your blog on Pinterest.
You have made my day. Thank you so much for taking a minute to share this with me. I’m so happy to hear that it struck a chord. It is a trap that we can all easily fall into. But, now that you realize it, you can move toward change.
I’m so grateful that you found me. I look forward to sharing more tips and inspiration with you.
Communication is certainly the key to any thriving, healthy and transparent relationship. Marriage need to be open to each other listening and speaking in a healing fashion.
Thank you for your thoughts. From the ladies who commented, you hit it dead center!
This was just what I needed. Thank you. Though my wife and I have been married for 39 years your video gave me the inspiration I needed. I too hadn’t realized just how much I was playing the blame game instead of asking myself what I could do to help the situation. We have a great marriage but, there have been times of poor communication. After thinking about the video and my past I concluded I had was pretty much blaming during arguments instead of thinking about the whole situation including MY role in it. Most importantly I discovered I was too quick with blame. This is going to change. I will be more thoughtful in the future. We all need always need to be open to new ideas and ways of looking at things especiallydurinv troubled times.
Thank you for the video.
Steve
You have made my day Steve. Thank you for taking a minute to tell me what you thought of the video. It makes me so happy to hear that you found it helpful. It is so fantastic that you are quick to take accountability and are willing to make strides toward change. That is the mark of a great spouse! Congrats on 39 years, btw. That is so fantastic!
I loved this and completely agree. I also had that revelation after many years of wondering if my marriage was able to be worked on besides divorcing and leaving the easy way out. Being accountable to myself .. my own behaviors, actions, decisions and contributions allowed me to work on myself in which then I knew I could and wanted to work on my marriage
HI Trish, thank you for sharing that. I feel that one of the most powerful things we can do is to look within. Sounds like you have done that. So awesome!
Thanks IDK how I ended up watching this but I needed to hear it. I’m 27 and have been with my wife for 11 years now since high school we have been together and the last two years have been rough with welcoming our first child (son) to deaths on both sides of the family. We have been in a “slump” so to say, but when we do talk about problems or anything in that matter having to do with our relationship it leads to a big argument and we have been ending up in a worse place than before.I realise now that not only has she been playing the blame game but I was ahead in points in this category. I have been blaming and pointing the finger at her, that everything is her fault and I have never done anything wrong. WOW!!! How wrong have I been and I can’t believe that I didn’t see what I was doing. I feel dumb and embarrassed about how I have been acting, also guilty for I have been blaming her for EVERYTHING THAT GOES WRONG EVEN THE LITTLEST THINGS. Thank you for helping me see just one of the many mistakes I have been making these past couple years THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Hi Coty. Thank you so much for sharing this with me. It sounds like you have been thru a lot the last few years. Those kinds of challenges are bound to throw a relationship for a loop. I’m so happy that you found the video helpful. It was a transformation for me and I hope it will be for you too.
Definitely its so easy to fall into the “blame game” as I call it. And it happens to me a lot, if fact, my husband and I had an argument this morning because he was telling me about something I usually do that annoys him and me, instead of accepting the fact that its true, I started pointing at this that he does that bother me. And I know its wrong, even when Im saying them but its like im to proud to stop or to accept that its wrong at the moment. We’ve been married for 2 years now, we have a loooong way to go, but your words were exaclty what I needed to hear. I have to be humble and know that much of the time is my fault as well, and I ahve to learn to deal with that and accept it even when we are arguing because that would help a lot!
So, i just want to thank you because I really needed to hear what you said and I now I realize I really have to start working on that.
Btw, im writing you from Costa Rica 🙂
Hello to Costa Rica! Thank you so much for taking a minute to reach out and share your thoughts. I am so happy to hear that you found the video helpful. It’s awesome that you recognized this about the argument. Marriage is a continuous learning curve. As long as you are willing to continue to grow and improve, things will be okay 🙂
This is so crazy I came across this video when I did. I am not legally married but the man I am with is my husband at heart. We feel like we are married. We are having some issues with communication and blaming each other. Although, we do step back a second and recognize who is truly at fault, *ourselves*, that realization isnt until we’ve had days of arguing over the same point and said things we don’t mean. I am definitely gonna show this video to my husband and we will hopefully be able to both take from it like I have. Thank you.
Hi Allie, I’m so very happy that you found that this video resonated with you. It really was life changing for me. I have learned to value the idea of accountability in our arguments especially. I was exactly where you are at so I can totally relate. I would love to hear what he thinks when you share it with him. Good luck!
I was taught at a pretty early age that when you are pointing you finger at someone there are 3 other fingers pointing right back at you. Works real well with your advice. Although we may be perfectly justified to be pointing that finger at our spouse, if we look at the 3 pointing our way and think about what we did to contribute to the situation things would eventually, as in your case, begin to go much more smoothly in our marriages.
Warn Regards,
Gary
Couldn’t have said it better myself. Thank you for your input Gary!
Thank you do much for the video. Its really useful. I blame myself for always pointing a fingure to my husband. Though he is not perfect and never admitt his wrong doings. This makes me very angry and start shouting and blame him. I will now improve my communication towards him.
I love that you are looking toward ways you can improve your marriage by looking within. Such an important key to a happy marriage.