Meet the Couple of the Month – Jaron and Melissa

Here at Married And Naked I believe strongly in the power of learning from each other’s experiences.  I believe that we all have so much to share!

I have decided to make it a tradition to share other people’s stories, as well as my own.  I feel that it could be helpful to hear what strategies other married couples have learned to help keep their marriage strong and happy.

I would love to hear from you too.  If you want to be considered for “Couple of the Month” please click here or click on the “Share Your Story” button in the menu bar.

So let us meet our first Couple of the Month! Meet Jaron and Melissa Duke, Married on May 7th, 2011.  Here is their answers to the “Share Your Story” questionnaire.

How Long Did You Date Before Getting Married?
11 years

How Did You Meet?
We met in high school…I was a senior and he was a sophomore. A mutual friend of ours introduced us and I learned that Jaron played drums so I asked him to teach me. I would go to his house after school to take lessons and we fell in love almost instantly.

What Do You Love Most About Being Married?
I love the constant companionship, knowing that we will be by each others sides even when times are really tough and knowing that we can raise our children in a house full of love.

What Do You Find Most Challenging About Being Married?
Trying to find a middle ground. We come from very different backgrounds…I was raised by both my parents and they paid for most everything I needed or wanted, college and all. Jaron’s mother was a single mom for a while and she struggled everyday to feed her three boys in Canada. She finally married again and moved them all to the states and got an amazing job, but times were still not easy.

How Do You Resolve Arguments?
Haha isn’t that what we are always learning how to do? This is the hardest part about having to face the same person day after day and not being able, nor wanting, to just walk away. My style of arguing is being quiet, his style is to be loud. We have learned that I need to take on some of his style and he needs to take on some of mine. It doesn’t always happen that way but my husband is an amazing example to me of how to always say “sorry” and kiss and make up. Even when it’s not totally his fault 🙂

What Didn’t You Know About Marriage Until You Were Married Yourself?
I didn’t know how much happiness it can truly bring into my life. I wasn’t always sure about marriage…Jaron and I dated off and on for 11 years and all I wanted was to be with him, but we struggled together and I could never see myself marrying anyone else. Without him, I saw marriage as being trapped with someone or settling just for the sake of doing what society said I should be doing. But now that we are married, we are so much happier than I ever imagined we could be.

How Do You and Your Spouse Stay Connected?
Lately we have had a hard time because I’m newly pregnant and I’ve been nauseous a lot and tired all the time. But mostly we just make sure we set time aside for each other with no phones, no TV or computers and we just enjoy each other. And he’s really great at scheduling adventures for us to go on. It’s wonderful to have new things to do together, it keeps the excitement going.

What Has Surprised You About Marriage?
It has surprised me how easy it actually is. I mean times have been rough and of course we have had our arguments, but I always thought marriage would be so much harder. Albeit we don’t have any children yet and I know that will change everything, but we have so much respect and love for each other and we both try everyday to keep the other happy.

What Is The Most Important Thing You Find In Keeping A Marriage Strong?
I think it’s respect and desire for the others happiness. If things aren’t going well, we care and we sit down and talk about it and try to make it better. We are honest with each other about our feelings and try to be respectful in the way we express them.

What Advice Would You Give Newlyweds?
It’s really important to be humble and to know that most arguments are your fault too. If things are getting rough, take a step outside of yourself to think about your spouse and their needs. If you can do that and give them what they need, you will be uplifted for it and your spouse will reciprocate.